For Shaida

If I could pull the night stars down,
like wallpaper. Peel it off in strips
and roll it up like gift wrap,
I would, and I would store it in a drawer.
Tuck it away, and hold on to
all those stars.
Keep them.
Save them.
For a day like this.
For a day like today, when all I want
is to wish on every star in the sky,
that I could change what happened.
That you could be whole.
That I could take your place.
Or that at the very least, that my chest was
big enough to manage all the pain I feel
right now.

I miss you.