Summer nights all sounds the same; the rattle of the heat, against the humidity and the thick of the shame that settles on the city eleven floors below. My skin is sticky with cigarette smoke, and the wretched weariness that feels more like dehydration of the mind; each thought, each movement – an effort not … More 8.20 Train
There are moments when we feel loss, in a way that ravages the outskirts of even the boundaries that we have set for ourselves. In the next breath, we can swim through love, as though it were a kind of sickness, that tears through the lungs and leaves you choking on its depths. I have … More Souvenirs of Yesterday
I have thought back over the last few years of my sobriety, on the friendships I have had and what sparked them, or what brought those friendships crashing down. It is safe to say that even as a small girl, any interaction I had with a fellow school mate, or anyone who I deemed a … More Broken Things. Awesome.
I get confused. The jackets made from the skin of the underdog, worn with a dismissive self importance. I dont like the familiar, but I will forgive the stranger – until he starts to button up that swagger. Until the corners of his lips curl, at the expense of a poor man on his knees. … More I Burn
Darling, my darling distraction. Will I regret this infraction? Will you hold my lies above my unrepentant face? Darling, my darling diversion. Do you linger for my perversion? Why do you stay when your love and your name I misplace? Darling, my darling weakling. Be quiet when I am speaking. I need you to leave … More I Can’t be Your Muse.
I will find my way, back to the edge. The edge of the mouth of the volcano that once invited me in, with a pulsing promise of complete silence. In rest. In the last prayer. In the belly of a burning, churning whisper. Freedom, it tells me. A reconnection with the life I left behind, … More My Edge
Look at me, in a way that makes me feel like you have ripped out my secrets and stored the bloody pieces in your pockets, proudly and with the intention of making them yours too. Touch me, in a way that makes me lean in, with out thinking. That makes me inhale you, like a … More Don’t Fall
I find it hard to write, when that is all I want to do. There is a riot of words going on in my skull, which now feels trapped and confined and plagued by the inability to articulate how I am feeling. I feel as though my spine may snap at the neck, with the … More 12 Hours
James and I are busy watching a series called The 100. Personally I think it is a bit cheesy but I am a sucker for big barbaric cavemen looking tribes to kill first and talk later. So.. It got me thinking. So basically these people come down to earth after being stuck up in space … More Random Thoughts No. 1
There are moments on some days, usually round late afternoon, that my speed train brain whips into turbo mode, and I get sad. Sad – but not sure why. I could collect all the thoughts that whiz by, and blame it on the collective negativity – but it feels more complicated and runs deeper than … More Dandelions…